Sermon

INTRODUCTION: In 1887, in what was viewed as one of the largest social experiments in American history, orphans and parentless children were swept up off the streets of New York and other New England cities and put onto trains, dubbed “orphan trains.” At stop by stop, the children would be pulled off the train to line up alongside it, as families from the area, mostly farmers, would “adopt” one of more of the abandoned children. Then the train would continue on through America and eventually end its journey in Ft. Worth, Texas. And by the time the orphan trains stopped running in 1929 – 42 years later – there had been more than 150,000 children resettled and adopted.

One of the many downsides to this effort was that the strongest and best looking children were chosen first. And by the time the train pulled into the depot in Ft. Worth, only the smallest, those with any infirmity, and those who simply were not chosen because of their looks or race were left.

Fortunately, in 1904, there was a Methodist minister in Ft. Worth, who began to work in placing the children in Ft. Worth, and to coordinate care with the railroad. Eventually, this led to an orphanage being built for the children left over. The orphanage eventually became a very upscale home for what was then called “unwed” mothers. Today it’s known as the Gladney Center for Adoption.

During the four years that I lived in Ft. Worth, I got to know a young family who had adopted three children from Edna Gladney. One time while our families were together at their house after dinner, the parents disclosed the process for picking up their second child at Edna Gladney.

It seems that whenever a family adopts a second child at Gladney, the first child is a part of the presentation process. She or he goes into the nursery and with the help of a nurse, brings the new baby out and presents her or him to their adoptive parents.

This had happened with our friends’ children as well. Ronnie, the first child, went in and brought out Carolyn, the second child, and then they both, a few years later, brought out Boyd, the third child.

Through the early years of their family, the personality patterns of the children began to develop. The middle child turned out to be a very active and sometimes rebellious child. In fact, she exhibited all the behavior patterns of what some then called the “middle child syndrome.” In short, to use technical language, she was a pill.

One night at the dinner table, little Carolyn was again the focus of attention and conflict. In the midst of the considerable disagreements going on, the oldest child, Ronnie, lay his head down upon the table and began to cry. His father, startled, reached over and put his hand upon his son’s head and asked him what was wrong. Finally, with tears streaming down his face and pointing his finger at his sister, he said, “Oh, Dad. I got the wrong one.” He was feeling responsible for the behavior of his sister, for he had been the one who had brought her out and presented her to their parents.

Now I’m sure there are times that some of us have had similar feelings about other arenas of life. It wasn’t the wrong selection of a sister or brother; nonetheless, we feel that we too got the wrong one – the wrong spouse or partner, the wrong job or house, the wrong college or major, the wrong friends, the wrong car, the wrong this, the wrong that. And we too feel like laying our heads upon the table and crying out, “Oh, God! I got the wrong one.”

And we blame that wrong choice in the past for our current unhappiness. Were it not for that bad choice, we’ve convinced ourselves, how better off things would be; how different a place we would be in. Or so we think.

Now as you wallow in that thought, may I suggest an alternative: A new year looms before us. As each of us responds to the invitation of the universe to begin a new year, much of our success or failure in the coming year – not the past year – much of our success or failure in the new year will be determined as much or more by inner circumstances, as outer. It will depend upon whether we have both our inside and outside in sync. For when we are in place, both within and without, when we have our stuff together, when our lives are lived in harmony and rhythm, then we are so much better able to live life fully. When the good times roll, we are ready fully to appreciate them; when the bad times come, we are able to face them and to deal with their consequences. It’s called, “Being in place” and that is not Pollyanna, but a response that stems from using the inner and outer resources that the universe has delivered to us.

The creatologist and psychologist long associated with the University of Chicago, Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi <ME-high CHICK-sent-me-high-ee>, has written several books dealing with this same issue, but he gives it a different descriptive phrase. He calls it finding flow. Finding that feeling of being in rhythm and sync with the universe – being in the flow. Here’s what I mean:

Have you awakened in the morning and felt great? You were ready for the day, ready for the challenge, ready for the opportunity, the crises – the dangerous opportunities awaiting you. You were in the flow.

Or have you ever been out on the golf course or the tennis court, and you finally seem to have gotten the game down. The last time you played you were all over, but today, geez! you’re playing as if you know how the game is to be played. You’re in the flow.

Have you ever been at work, when for some reason, everything seems to be falling in place. The right words, the right decisions, the right people, the right equipment – everything is going great. You’re in the flow.

Have you ever been at home, and dinner was delicious, your kids super, your spouse or partner terrific, and all for no apparent reason. It was just – you were in the flow.

Contrarily, I’m sure that there have been other days when you felt totally different. You would have gladly shipped your kids off to Siberia and your spouse or partner along with them. There have been days when you are positive that the people you work with must have escaped from the Dumb Farm. And there are days when if it weren’t for bad luck, you wouldn’t have any luck at all.

There are also those days when the issue is much deeper: When in the inner recesses of your soul, you wonder what’s wrong with life? What’s it all about, Alfie? Why am I? Where I am? Why am I doing what I’m doing? And why am I doing it with whom I’m doing it?

That’s being out of flow, out of sync with life, with the universe, with the cosmos, with divinity, with the spirit. So what do we do?

I’m going to suggest this possibility for addressing the feeling of life’s not seeming right…of not being in place. It’s this:

By spiritual dimension, I mean by trying to live inside out. When we began to try and live from within rather than without; when we began to live in inner harmony and peace; then I promise, life on the outside is a whole lot better. When good things happen, we can enjoy them more. When bad things happen, we can take it. We’ve got our stuff together. We know who we are and what we are about. In so doing, we discover that we can live life with less greed, less anger, more joy and more satisfaction.

So what if we’re thinking we heard this before. The issue is how do we actually do it? I’m glad you asked that. Here’s a liberal religious prescription for a spiritual life in the year 2010.

FIRST, begin consciously to practice thinking of yourself as a good person. Let’s start now. Say it out loud with me: I am a good person. Say it again: I am a good person. Say it once more: I am a good person.

You are, you know. But why is it that we have such difficulty in admitting to our goodness? Think of your life yesterday. I venture to say that every one of us here lived a decent, good life yesterday. And for that small percentage of us who slipped in some minor error, it was only for a part of the day. For most of the day, we did just fine. That’s true for all of us nearly every day of every week. So why don’t we affirm it?

Now as an aside: If there are those religious congregations who think it makes us good to admit we’re bad, and bad to admit we’re good, it’s okay for them to do that. And if there are those who think that if we confess to being poor miserable, lost sinful souls, that it will somehow make us no longer poor, miserable, lost sinful souls, okay.

But I would like to very graciously suggest that we can also teach goodness by appealing to goodness, not badness; that we can proclaim the possibilities inherent in this wonderful gift of a life that we have been given.

So when you get up in the morning, announce to yourself in the mirror, “I am a good person.” Say it three times for emphasis. And don’t be surprised that evening when you reflect back over the day that you have indeed been a good person. So affirm your goodness. That’s the first regimen of the prescription.

SECOND, make a list of people that you find it very hard to live with, or work with, or to think about, or to be related to, without getting irritated. There’s a word for that kind of list, but it’s inappropriate in polite society. But it’s those people who can really pull our chain. They can turn a good day into the worst day of the week.

And when you’ve got your list done, do something rather simple: Put the list in your hands, raise it up to the sky, and use one of the following words and say: “Universe, Cosmos, God, Spirit, Divinity” – whatever word you feel most comfortable with – and say, “Here they are, God. You can have them. They are yours. I’m tired of them ruining my day. I’m tired of gritching about them at every turn. And I know everybody who knows me is tired of hearing about them from me. So here they are. Take ‘em. I’m through complaining. There’s a new me, a spiritual me with a new time sheet, a new slate. It’s ‘overs’ time.” (Some of you men may remember playing marbles as a child and how you went to use your “tall” and you squeezed it so hard that it popped out at the wrong time; but if you hurried and said, “overs,” in some games you could shoot over.) So give yourself another shot – an over.

Give all those people on your “done-me-wrong list” to the universe and forget about them. Get over that ex-spouse. Rise above that bad boss. Refuse to get into the boxing ring with those who see their mission in life’s being to bring you down. From now on, they are not your responsibility, so get on with life. Give the universe your done-me-wrongs.

THIRD, set aside a special time each day of at least three to five minutes. That’s when you are going to take a spiritual time out. This time out is for your inner self.

You may spend this time out merely looking at a beautiful painting. You may look closely at some piece of the beauty of the world outside, such as a beautiful flower or tree. Or you may think about the good things of the day before. Or, think about this moment. Or simply, don’t think at all.

Maybe you will want to say a prayer. Practice a meditation. Read something inspirational from a book, some sacred scripture, some article, some saying, or maybe even some sermon.

Listen to the silence. Hear the whisper. Catch the rhythm. Feel the flow. Get on your pony and ride. Time-out, spiritually speaking.

Resolve this year to (1) affirm yourself; (2) to give back to the universe your done-me-wrongs; and (3) take a spiritual time out.

CONCLUSION

There is a level of living that can be fuller and more meaningful. It relates to our finding a way to relate to the Whole of which we are a Part. It’s a way of discovering how to relate to the mystery of which we are a part. It’s a way of identifying, of giving a name to the encompassing mystery before which we all stand.

Approximately, every 365¼ days, our planet makes a complete orbit around the sun. We call that a year. To be astronomically correct, I suppose the new year would begin on the first day of the winter solstice. But our calendar wasn’t designed by scientists, but by the pontifex maximus of the Western world, which was first the work of Julius Caesar, Emperor of Rome and then of Pope Gregory XIII, Bishop of Rome. But the intention is the same: to allow us to know that our planet is ready to start a new orbit of the sun.

As an intentionally religious person, I view that as an invitation of the universe to renew our spiritual orbit too. It’s one of the gifts which the universe extends to us on this tenth day of this new year 2010: Starting over.

[1] The first sermon of the New Year 2010 preached at All Faiths Unitarian Congregation of Ft. Myers, FL, by the Rev. Dr. Wayne Robinson, Minister, meeting temporarily at the Crestwell School, 1901 Park Meadows, Ft. Myers, FL.